Laughter, the best medicine

I get sent a lot of jokes via email. But sometimes, I think I can do better. One of these days, I’ll have enough of these for a sitcom.

Scientists say that goldfish have a memory of a few seconds. How do they know? Do they interview the goldfish?
   Which brings me on to cat food. How do we know it’s tasty? Did someone ask a cat? Or did some poor bastard have to try it?

—As a traffic cop, I have seen some ridiculous behaviour. There was this one time when I pulled over a car to find that a woman had been giving her husband a blow-job.
—That’s not unheard of, Jack.
—Yeah, but she was driving!

Don Brash was giving a speech the other night. Then the karaoke bar manager took the mike off him and told him to stop wasting everyone’s time.

The Greg Brady manœuvre is a move used by some teenage boys to get a snog from a girl. But the Karori Pool is not one used by the elderly.

   Yes, I was watching Finding Nemo earlier this evening, and the second joke did come (sorry) while I was driving. The last one may need an explanation, especially for those outside Wellington: pool and pull are nearly homonyms, and I always associate Karori as a suburb where older people live.